Yes, I know this is a surprise, not something we thought was going to happen now but it has and we are thrilled and cannot wait to bring her home. Here is our story;

(several people have mentioned to me that they tried to leave a message and couldn't. I think I have adjusted the settings to make that possible so try again)



Years ago I remember flipping through a magazine and seeing an article about the abandoned girls in Ch*na. I can still see the photograph of a little girl laying on the sidewalk and everyone just walking by like she was no more important than the litter scattered around her. The image has always been there and that is probably the moment that I first thought about adopting from Ch*na. Fast forward a few years. John and I are married we have two healthy baby boys and I start to think about adopting that little girl in Ch*na again. Honestly, John wasn't for it or against it he just wasn't sure if he wanted more kids. Then we became pregnant and lost a little girl. That was so hard for me. I always dreamed of having a little girl and it was devastating to lose her.That stirred up in me the desire to have another child. I was scared to get pregnant again so naturally I thought of Ch*na again. I started to pray that if it was God's will for our daughter to come from Ch*na then he was going to have to work towards preparing John's heart for adoption. Without going into a lot of detail some things happened with John's job and the expense of adopting a child was no longer an option. Then as you know we got pregnant, again, twice and had two more amazing little boys. Our boys are everything and I love them more than anything in this world but the desire to have a daughter would not go away. I prayed for it to go away. Four children was enough, how could we possibly raise a fifth and how in the world would John ever go for that? Well that desire did not go away and little did I know it began to grow more strongly in John. As time went by I knew we had a daughter in Ch*na, I absolutely knew it. I strategically picked our anniversary trip to the mountains in July 2007 to talk about adopting to John. It was now or never. When I brought it up I was surprised when he said "let's do it". We knew the wait for a child was getting longer and didn't want to waste time. We went to an adoption seminar and was told the wait was currently 2 to 2 1/2 years. That was perfect. We gathered all the documents, got physicals, got fingerprinted and sent everything to Ch*na in December 2007. We were so excited! Well it didn't take long for me to realize that there was not going to be a 2 to 2 1/2 year wait for us, it was going to be MUCH longer! We are not sure why but there has been a major slow down in adoptions and we were facing a wait of possible 4-8 years. What??? I almost drove myself crazy on the Internet, reading peoples blogs, checking on how long it was taking. I became weary. We didn't want to wait that long, who wants to be 65 when there child graduates from high school? Well we knew we didn't. Our only options were to switch to another country or switch to the Special Needs list. After talking with my adoption agency we decided to switch to Russia. I felt uneasy about it but we proceeded anyway. After all the paperwork was done and we were about to send it in we went out to eat one night. When we walked in the door there were two little Asian girls sitting with there American family. It was in that moment that I knew without a doubt our daughter was in Ch*na. John and I talked about it and decided that we would not send our paperwork to Russia and we would wait on Ch*ina. At that point we starting to consider the Special Needs list. Every month our agency sends us a list of Special Needs kids who need a home. Every month we look at that list. Well on October 28 we got a new list. There was a little girl with a minor need but she was older than we had originally planned on . When we got the email with all her information and we first saw her face, we knew, this was her. This was the child God had planned for us. We quickly called our agency and requested to "lock her In". That means we have 48 hours to make a decision. I had prayed that if this was not our daughter for God to close the doors. No doors were closed, they were opened. You see God used our desire for a daughter to turn our hearts toward adoption and used the long wait to lead us to this child on the Special Needs list. Everything fell into place and we officially sent in our Letter of Intent (to adopt) on October 31, 2008. We had to wait for Ch*na to send us a Pre Approval (PA). We didn't tell anyone until we had PA from Ch*na. We received PA on November 13th. Now we wait again. We expect to go sometime in the next 3 to 7 months to Ch*na to get her. We don't expect everyone to understand what we are doing but we do ask for your support and prayers. This girls world is going to be turned upside down and even though she will have a better life it will still be hard for her for a while. I cannot post her picture because we are not allowed to per our agency. I am going to start a locked blog so that I can post pictures and details about everything in privacy. If you would like access to that blog please leave a post here with your email address and I will send you the password when the blog is started or just email me and I will email you back. Tonight I am praising God for this Blessing and Thanking him for opening our hearts to the gift of adoption.

Yesterday was the last time I had to wake in the wee hours of the morning.
It was the last time I had to put on my ugly MTC uniform.
It was the last time I had to drive to clinical (usually while still dark outside).
The last time I had to park in the "pit" at the hospital and walk 1/2 mile uphill in rain or cold or sweltering heat to get to the main building.
The last time I had to collect enough data to fill out my paperwork.
The last time I got to hang with my good friends whom I have really grown to care for :0(
I thought I would be giddy with excitement as I left the hospital but I felt weird.
My classmates asked me "what' wrong, you're not your usual self"?
I didn't know what to say. Maybe I am nervous about this ending and having to actually get a job. Maybe I just will miss the time I got to spend hanging out with these girls laughing and learning together. I can't say for certain but it was problably a little of both. Sad for it to end but ready for it too.

*It is just as or more important for you to have a good nurse in the hospital than it is a good doctor!
*That I am so happy I had my children before I had 18 hours worth of lectures about everything that could go wrong with mommy and baby.
*That blood does not bother me at all but vomit and poop (the grown up kind) I almost cannot handle. It takes everything I have to keep it together in front of my patient.
*That nursing is very rewarding and many patients will Thank You profusely for taking care of them.
*That most patients apologize to their nurse if the nurse has to do something that embarrasses them. (change a dirty brief, a dressing, empty a bedpan etc..)
*That it is so hard to keep a straight face when your patient "blows" you in the face while changing their brief.
*That I will never view my body the same again. Every little thing could potentially be something big (in other words I can see how nurses become hypochondriacs).
*That everyone will ask you for health advice and it's usually about something I know NOTHING about.
*That if you pretend you know what you're doing your patient will not get totally freaked out by having a nursing student for their nurse. And that some people love to have a student for a nurse because we are so cautious and spend time with our patients.
*That everyone thinks nurses make a ton of $$ but I think they are underpaid for how hard it is and how much you have to know and for how much responsibility you have.
*How to make perfect corners when making a bed.
*How to make a pillow when you cannot find extras on the floor out of pillowcases and towels.
*That sometimes all your patient wants is for someone to listen to them.
*That it is a very hard profession and I love it!

The reason I went to nursing school was for Labor and Delivery. I loved the experience of having my babies and wanted to be a part of that for others. In school I became very interested in "sick" nursing. I put L&D to the side and thought maybe I would rather do something else. Afterall, I did like the thrill of the ER, the seriousness of cardiac nursing and taking care of someone real sick. But after all this time I believe I have come full circle. Last week I had my last clinical, it was in OB/GYN. Friday specifically was L&D. I loved it. I feel at home there. It was comfortable and I understand it. This is where I want to work, the only problem is so do a lot of other people. L&D jobs are actually hard to come by, even nights. (which nobody wants!)
I talked to the nurse manager, she has one opening on nights and already has 4 applicants. She told me to apply so I did. No idea if I will hear anything or not but I have my fingers crossed!

Sellers has had a loose tooth for weeks. Scared to pull it out. Sometimes scared to eat.
Finally last night he pulled it. He was so excited and of course he placed his tooth under his pillow. This morning he lifted up the pillow with excitement expecting to see some reward for pulling his tooth but instead all he saw was the tooth. Tears followed. Parents panicked. The Tooth Fairy forgot. The only thing John could think to say was "maybe she didn't want to come 'cause she was afraid of getting your virus". Now that's comforting. Tooth will go under the pillow again tonight and hopefully the Tooth Fairy will not forget and there will be no tears in the morning. And the Tooth Fairy feels so bad for forgetting she'll probably throw in some extra $.

Who's idea was this whole Tooth Fairy thing anyway? John and I figure by the time the Tooth Fairy pays for all our kids lost teeth she could have gone on a nice, relaxing vacation instead. But perhaps just the smile and delight in our child's face when she comes is worth it.

update* The tooth fairy came last night and there was one happy little boy this morning already planning what to do with the loot!

Mason (not Wyatt this time) had a funny. Mason is just becoming more verbal and said this last night:

He was doing something on the couch he wasn't supposed to be doing and John told him to quit. Of course he did what any 2 year old would do, ignored him. John got up and went to remove him from the couch when Mason's arms flew up in the air and he looked right at John and yelled ever so toddlerish "stop sign". It took us a second to realize what he said and then we busted out laughing. So guess who thinks it's funny to yell "stop sign" now when you approach him?

Today I finished Pediatric clinicals. I have been waiting all semester for this. Do I want to do cardiac nursing or pediatric when I graduate? This was going to be my last chance to try it out. Two days on the unit is all it took for me to know, it is not for me. Sick children are tough and their parents are tougher. It is like having two patients rolled up in one. I just don't think I can do it. Boy am I glad I had the chance to "try it before you buy it". Looks like cardiac, well maybe OB. I have that clinical next week......

6th picture in the 6th folder...hmmm. Let's go see what that is........

Well I cheated. This is number 7, number 6 was a picture of just a classmate. I thought you would find this one much more interesting. This is my first clinical class in Nursing 101 in January of 2007. I was at the VA Hospital. I think back to how unconfident I was back then and really didn't know what I was doing. I mean it would take me all day just to do vitals, give a bath, change sheets and give meds to one patient. I became great friends with many of these folks and 3 of them will be graduating with me in December!

This verse speaks loudly to me. I had to share it.


""...once our eyes are opened,
we can't pretend we don't know what to do.
God,who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls,
knows that we know,
and holds us responsible to act."
(Proverbs 24:12)

This is a great website to play around with your photos. This is the same photo, the first is using the sephia, the second is the vignette and the last is the original.

We had all the boys cousins over for Halloween. We had so much fun together eating hotdogs and fixin's, popcorn, trick or treatin' and roasting marshmellows.